As a woman in a corporate setting, I can speak for a lot of us when I say that the last thing on our boss's mind is mindfulness. They normally don't really care what you're thinking, how you're feeling - as long as you are getting their work done, they are the happy ones.
This really freakin' bothered me (and still does) - but I learned a little affirmation from the book The Four Agreements.
O.M.G is it hard to do that! Not taking things like your boss genuinely not giving two shits about how you're feeling (or not feeling) feels like such a personal attack. It's the very thing that sent me into a downward spiral of hatred for my workplace. It's a huge reason why you're even reading this blog post from me.
Although not taking things personal is a whole post for a different time, I want to take a few minutes to talk about the ground rules behind the affirmation.
Today we're talking about grounding in the work place!
So as I've already said, one of my huge triggers for spiraling into complete lack of mindfulness in my job is my boss! And I know I'm not alone when it comes to having these triggers that make us want to literally yank our hair out and scream like we're being stung by a million bees the second we get in our cars after our shift. Been there - done that!
The reason I brought up the affirmation of "Don't take anything personal" is because it was something that helped me to stay calm and bring myself back down to earth when I was having a moment. At the end of the day, the way someone treats you is a direct reflection of how they are feeling on the inside.
When you can approach someone with peace and humility, you are reflecting onto that person exactly how you are feeling inside. Well, how the hell do we feel humble when we're being made to feel like a ball of stress?
Let's go there!
Your breath is your savior.
Seriously. Your breath will shockingly be able to get you through more than you could ever imagine. When we get worked up and stressed in the workplace, normally 1 of 2 things happen.
We either hold our breath. Our faces turn red. We feel light headed. Like we're literally trying to remove ourselves from the situation by quietly working our way up towards fainting.
Or, on the flip side, we start breathing heavier. Light headedness still kicks in. But this may feel more like a full blown anxiety/panic attack.
I've definitely experienced both and they're both completely unideal. Your breath will naturally be affected by any increase in stress level. The key is learning to control it.
When you feel like you want to punch a boss square in the kisser, try breathing to the count of 5. Deep slow breaths. In through the nose for 5 and out of your mouth for the count of 5. Do this until your breathing feels normal again.
Since this is a meditative breath, you may feel a little tingly or lightheaded. Maybe even catch a little "high." Totally normal. You're doing your best at regulating your breath and getting that oxygen flowing normally again so you may feel a little weird. But at least you feel high and not stressed - am I right? Kidding.
Walk it out.
As someone who frequents the sitting position and the good ole tension knots in the shoulder areas, I can attest to the concept of literally walking it out.
If you have a lunch break and are stressed the F out - go walk around for a bit. Take the time that is designated to you to do something that will move the stress out of your body. Movement helps with stress reduction - science. Go look it up.
Seriously though, the days that I have a million negative thoughts flooding through my head are always best resolved with some sort of movement. Even if it has to wait until I get home to make it happen.
Just do it.
Diffuse those oils.
I have a huge advocate for aromatherapy. Giving your sniffer some good scents really can lighten your mood and put you into a lighter place.
I have an oil diffuser right on my desk and another in my car. (Yes, they make car diffusers!)
The moment we see the bosses roll up, you better believe that we've got a nice citrus blend ready to diffuse. Citrus fragrances (oranges, lemons, limes) are great for uplifting moods and relieving stress. Just make sure that you get quality oils, like DoTERRA. You don't want to be breathing in harsh chemicals and who knows what else from the cheap oils.
Do not hold your emotions inside for too long. I REPEAT - DO NOT HOLD THEM IN. This is a silent killer all on its own. If you hold things in they will build and get progressively worse over time. That is not the way you want to be living your life.
Find someone (coworker or otherwise) that you completely trust and who understands your situation and just start venting. Let out all of your frustration and negative emotions. While these thoughts are spewing, try to discover the root. Why are you feeling this way? Why does this person have this affect on you? I have an entire post dedicated to this topic in particular that you can find here.
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Most of these things have no expense behind them, so you have no excuse to not try a few of them the next time that you are experiencing some serious stressful times at work.
Your wellbeing is most important. Your job is replaceable, your body and mind are not. Take care of yourself wholeheartedly. You need to love yourself in order to perform at your peak ability.
Do you already use some of these techniques? Which ones? Maybe you're trying a different technique that I haven't covered - feel free to share it in the comments below!